Divorce support for men: How to be a father during and after divorce


Divorce can be one of the most devastating events in a man’s life. In all-too-many cases, fathers become mere visitors in their own children’s lives. Fathers can come to feel that the emotional support they give their children is undervalued, and that the only role society assigns to them is that of a financial provider.

How do you stay in the picture? How do you live through the anguish and anger of your situation, day in and day out? How do you decide what to fight for, and when to let go? How do you deal with moments of discouragement or despair?

I want to share with you “the divorced father’s promise”, to give you a sense of hope and focus:

“A divorced dad is still a dad. You will always be your child’s father – from close or from afar.

“You affirm your right to be a father by exercising it – in the best way you can at the time. You define yourself by what you can give, not by what you can’t.”

You may feel that dealing with your feelings is a luxury you can’t afford at this time. You may be afraid that, if you were to be too conscious of your emotions, you would no longer be capable of coping with the pressures of your divorce. But it’s just the opposite. Dealing with your emotional issues will help you deal more efficiently with all the other issues.